Tamika's Journal

Gerald Poulton  I think the worst part, so far, about recovery was the fear and the next will be the length of time. Soon it will just be a memory though, all the best 👍

Tamika J  Thankyou all my new heart sisters and brothers your support and prayers meant a lot to me! What a ride, Imglad it's over😊

Catie B  So pleased to have word from you and it's great you're doing well. I know it's a relief that the surgery is behind you. Keep on getting stronger!

  I will pray for a great outcome and speedy recovery for you. I had the same surgery 4 months ago. I think the stress leading up to the surgery was the worst part just because it is such a big unknown. Everything afterwards you just learn to deal with one day at a time.

Robyn Tatu  We're all behind you, Tamika. Prayers coming in! You'll be surprised how well you will do in recovery. Please keep us posted - or have someone write for you for the first few days. For me, the day before surgery was the worst of the whole journey - when you are on the recovery side you'll be more in control and you'll have goals to accomplish. MUCH easier. Follow all instructions and remember you are in good hands. We look forward to hearing from you in a few days.

Steve Farthing  Hi Tamika - My mitral valve was repaired 6 weeks ago. Recovery has gone very well. And you look to be much younger than me which is a nice advantage you have. Will be sending you healing thoughts and vibes.

Catie B  Prayers for you, Tamika! They take really good care of you in ICU. And very soon, they'll have you walking the halls to start getting your strength back. All the best to you!

Tamika J  I thank you everyone for your prayers and commments I enjoy reading positive responses they give me hope.

Melissa Alfred  I just completed cardiac rehab, surgery was April 11th. honestly, the worry and stress prior to surgery was worse than the recovery. I know that sounds like BS, but for real it's not that bad. all the best to you!! xo

Jill Krajnovich  Prayers & best wishes for you tomorrow, Tamika! I am 3 weeks post-op & while the first days were rough, just walked all over the Indiana State Fair today & thought how far I've come in just 3 weeks.

Michelle E  My thoughts and prayers are with you. I see surgery was postponed once.That must have been very tough. Hope this time it will all go through with flying colors!

Bob Fessler  Recovery was only hard because I did not have any energy. Also it was hard because the hospital nurses would not let me sleep in peace. No pain, just tiredness.

Gerald Poulton  I agree, amazing how little sternum pain there is, tylonol is really all you need. You willdo fine 🌷

Shannon Gray  I know it's scary...nothing can convince you otherwise, but know you have my prayers and wishes for a speedy recovery. Thinking of you!

Catie B  Tamika, that's a hard adjustment. I was thinking you'd already had your operation. Best to you as you wait again....

  What was the reason? An emergency come up? That's the hardest thing when have the anxiety of surgery just to go through it again. So Sorry. I can't imagine. I also believe things happen for a reason. This is how it was meant to be. 🙁

Tamika J  Thank you The ICU is filled to capacity this week waiting to have a full staff available for my date

Rose Madura  My initial surgery was also postponed and I cried the whole day when I found out. You get ready and then you have to wait. But it will be ok. God bless you.

Laura Jacobs  That is tough for sure Tamika. I hope it doesn't take too long to get adjusted mentally for the new date. One thing I would not want to happen is to be in the ICU when there are staff shortages. When I was in the step down unit I noticed that the nursing staff seemed a tad short when the weekend hit. Perhaps someone called in sick. I felt bad for them as they were working so hard to keep up with things. It might be good to wait to have a lot of people ready and waiting to look after you.

Clayton Mcarthur  Nothing worse than that after you've prepared yourself mentally. Many of these hospitals are so busy, I never realized the demand was so high. Hang in there, you'll get this behind you.

Matthew Russo  Hello Tamika, yes I had a minor stroke before OHS. That was how the aortic aneurysm and PFO was discovered. Happy to answer any questions you may have to help you prepare mentally for your surgery.

Tamika J  Thankyou So much Jeanette and Matthew! It means so much toe when people respond! Searching for an actual person in my hometown who has even had I HS is like trying to find a needle in a haystack, no zipper scars around anywhere So I'm thankful for this Community! Yes I'm a whiner and a big baby, but I'm afraid! The past year of my life has been pure hell! And now OHS..

Laura Jacobs  Dear Tamika, We all have a baby in us that needs support and attention...sometimes more than other times. We deserve a little pampering when we a facing a big life event. We were all scared. One of the things that my nurse said to me in the hospital right after the surgery was "Be a squeaky wheel". She wanted me to make sure I got what I needed. It was good advice.

Marie Myers  I agree with Laura. I am on this site a lot even tho my surgery was 3 months ago. I am back at work, honestly feeling like nothing happened...

Lilly Black  Tamika, I understand the fear! but I'm the kind of person that needs to know and understand as much as I can about my body. I listen to my body and caught the aneurysm before any Doctor diagnosed it. I knew something was up because I was feeling different. Just take a day at a time, there's a lot to learn and digest......good luck! and keep up on this site, you will feel better because you will know you are not alone! :)

Civita Fahey  I am like Lilly, I need to understand what is going on. I did read Adam's book, it helped me a lot to start understanding what was going to happen. Also, reading the posts of all the successful surgeries helped me.. I spoke with several people who had had the surgery either by phone or email. This is what got me through it.. its a very scary journey but now I do understand that the people in charge are really experts and these procedures are very common to them. Being on this side, after 12 weeks, yes, there are days that I forget I went through it all. Tamika, you can do this.. you need to have faith and educate yourself as much as possible about what will happen, complications that could happen and how they/you will deal with it. .I found all this helped me, but my biggest thing was faith.. you need to believe . Best of luck.

Dan Marcantel  Sorry to say this Adam but I bought the book when I 1st joined and was sort of unimpressed. Other than his own interesting personal account you will be able to find the same info by reading others stories. I was much like you fear of the unknown and found the site. Kudo's to Adam for starting the site because it allows you to learn from the numerous others who have gone and going through the same thing. Again no offense because Adam does all this for free and I ado appreciate what he did and does do.

Larry Behan  Hi Tamika, like you, I experienced stress, fear of the unknown, uncertainty etc when I was first really told I had problems with my aortic valve 18 months ago. I came away from the cardiologist wondering if the doctor had said what I thought he'd said. My friend who was with me was able to recount exactly what the cardiologist had told me, and yes, it was as I had feared, my aortic valve was narrowed and would in all likelihood need to be replaced at some point. But in the meantime, it would be monitored for any changes. When I eventually got home, I did a quick google search of heart valve surgery and thankfully came upon a story about Adam and his book. Long story short, I bought it and it has really, really helped me to understand the role the valves in our hearts' play and what happens when they begin to give trouble. Don't get me wrong, I'm very squeamish normally, but the book gave me a vehicle for understanding better what is involved from pre op through surgery and recovery. Please God, if you do decide to read it, some of your concerns will be allayed - many of mine were! God Bless you, and I'll be praying for you.

Eric Linnenburger  Hi Tamika, I would recommend reading it. I think you'll find it's not as bad as you think and educating yourself from the patient perspective is the best way to be prepared and minimize some fears. With that being said, I also recommend trying to remove yourself at times and do the things you enjoy. It's easy to get wrapped up to the point of taking over every waking thought and that's counterproductive. You got this! I'm 2 weeks post op today and must say the whole experience was way less eventful than I ever could have imagined. Good luck!

Lilly Black  Eric, this is good feedback and I totally agree with you! the best way to learn is from the patient's perspective......I spoke to many patients after they have had their surgery and it was extremely helpful! :)

Russell Knox  I read the book in two days. I found out a month ago about my AVR. First thing I did; I searched YouTube for a video of the actual surgery. Crazy? Not really. I have discovered that you can't be afraid of what you understand. I have looked at all the videos I could. Even about the different valves that are available. It gave me the general knowledge and exposure to the procedure and the language so I could discuss anything I needed to with my surgeon.

Lilly Black  Russell, I did a lot of research too, including Doctors and Surgeons. When I found the right Surgeon, and scheduled the date of Surgery, I was at peace and ready to go for it! it was scary but I was in great hands and recovered very well!

Tamika, I was in shock for a week or so, I was crying and very upset! but then I realized I had to pull it together for my family because they counted on me. I took one day at a time and was able to overcome the shock and fear slowly but surely! Take care......you will do fine! most of us do fine and feel so much better when our hearts are fixed! :)

Jennifer McInerney  Hi Tamika, im so sorry that you atre going through this but fear and anxiety are definitely normal. Im still waiting or a surgery date and its not easy. I feel like my life is on hold. Its really tough on my husband too.

Barbara Wood  Hi Tamika- so sorry to hear you're struggling with this. It makes it extra hard having a young child- mine are grown but it was still hard for them to hear I needed ohs. It is very stressful & scary in the days before surgery! Like a lot of people that I read about on here, I felt completely calm & ok with it about 2 days before the operation. I hope this is the case for you too:).
I'm almost 8 weeks out from my surgery- mitral valve repair, like you- & the relief of having it behind me, not anticipating it, hits me nearly everyday. You will soon be on this side too! There are physical challenges in recovery for most of us, but no longer looking at surgery ahead of us is sweet!

Not to write a book here, but I found the surgery & hospital stay much easier than I anticipated. You'll be in the hands of experts who deal with this everyday. Wishing you & your family all the best & sending positive vibes your way. You will do just fine, it really is doable!

Clare Auten  Your feelings of fear, anxiety, and lonliness are very common. I had my Aortic Valve replaced 3.5 years ago. I feel that having young children increases these feelings because they are counting on you. My kids were 4, 7 and 13 at the time of my surgery. They each it a little differently. Every once in a while, they still talk about my surgery and the time right after but we have all moved on. Praying for a successful surgery for you and an easy recovery.

Laura Jacobs  Dear Tamika, You are definitely not alone! We are all here to support you in any way that we can. We have all had fear, but I must say that if I had young children I think I would have found it much harder. My youngest is 19 and I was so worried about her...I cannot imagine how I would have felt if she was only 10 years old. Like others, I also experienced a sense of calm and peace a few days before the surgery. I just wanted to feel better and be able to do the things that I used to enjoy. I found that focusing on the benefits of the surgery helped my look forward to the future with anticipation rather than fear. Think about how active you are going to be and how your time with your daughter will be so much more rewarding for the both of you. I am three weeks out of surgery and feeling much better already. The recovery has been easier than I had anticipated...not easy but not horrible either. Best wishes to you for a quick recovery!!

Lise Bowles  Hi Tamika! If you weren't feeling scared right now I don't think you would be normal! Heart Surgery is scary!!! The good news is, that once you get the surgery, you will feel much better and we get to move on with our lives, what a blessing. I just held on closely to my loved ones and tried to stay positive and prayed. These surgeries are done very often these days and are not as nearly complicated and overwhelming to the doctors as they are to us, just the idea of having to have heart surgery scared me half to death....you will do fine, just try to stay in the now and not project to the future. I had to wait for 2 1/2 months to get into my doc, it wasn't easy, but be good to yourself and enjoy the day, your child, the sun, nature, I tried to focus on gratitude for all the goodness that I have each day, you can too. ❤️

Shannon Gray  I understand your feelings...my children were 9 and 2 at the time. Recovery was challenging for me, due to them not understanding why mommy "couldn't" do certain things. Time will heal, and always keep an open dialogue with your daughter. Having tough discussions will help both of you. Many blessings!

Sherry Nichols  Dear Tamika, Welcome, Welcome my newest heart sister!!!!! You're in the right place for support. I joined back in 2015 and it has been the best site I could have ever joined. The people in this community are the most caring, supportive, loving and encouraging group of people I have ever met. I do understand the fear and the uncertainty. (Please read my journals and you'll see that we have a lot in common) Just know that I'll be praying for you to have a successful surgery and a speedy recovery. May God continue to bless you!!

Jill Krajnovich  Hi Tamika, My surgery is next week as well and I am certainly dreading it. As the day grows closer, it is weighing more and more on my mind and is hard not to think about. My youngest will turn 17 about 2 weeks after my surgery. I wish I could have put it off another year until she started college but I have already put it off about a year. After 3 opinions all recommending surgery, I decided not to wait any longer. I will pray that God eases your stress and that all goes well for you. Let this site and all of these people be an encouragement to you! You are not alone!

Barbara Helen Dance  Hello Tamika, I ad my surgery on July 4th ,in England this year, and despite having had nursing experience, it di absolutely nothing to stop my being more afraid of heart surgery than anything else.....(they say a bit of knowledge is dangerous). However, everybody on this site assured me that the waiting was the worst, and it was!!!. I feel that having now had my surgery, I have something tangible to work to. my future and the confusing love of my family. Yes, its painful( but not if you keep your pain relief stable, and it is hard work..... but for me its early days, and you too will come through it.xxx try not too worry.... easier said than done.... and I should know. 😓

Barbara Helen Dance  That was meant to read continuing love NOT confusing love..... as you can proberbly tell the anaesthetic is still working itself out of my system.....😏xx

Marie Myers  I was scared too when I learned I would need surgery last fall. The anticipation was definitely worse than reality. Granted, surgery was no bed of roses, but I got through it, and you will too! Just take it 1 day at a time. I wish you peace and acceptence on your heart journey ...

Rita Savelis  Fear is normal. There is no one who goes through this without fear. But surgery itself is out of your hands. You have to surrender and trust the surgeons who do this kind of surgery successfully everyday.
Wishing you some peace.