MIchelle's Journal

I guess life just gets in the way...what can I say it's crazy busy and having OHS surgery is almost a blur. My health continues to go up and down but you learn to cope. All the others "health" issues I deal with now are small potatoes. I hope anyone is about to go down the journey of OHS goes in with as much positivity as you can. It's hard and there are so many emotions that come with that sentence but know that you can get through it. So many negative things happened since then and again I say it's small potatoes..... Life is a mystery and no one knows why we are dealt the cards we have. Play them baby!!!

2014 has not been a great both personally and health wise. My dad battled cancer all this year and passed away on July 7th. My new "fixed heart" is broken again. How we will go on without our rock is beyond me. I have questioned my faith over & over and I am mentally drained. The love I have for my father is something that will NEVER die and I promise to keep him alive in my heart and my kids hearts. I think back to my surgery and how scared I was and my dad telling me to stop worrying and that I would be fine..... I wish that I could have told him the same, Life is not fair, but it goes on no matter what. I have really stopped working out with all that has happened and in turn am not feeling so great either. Today after going back to Boston I am going to get back on track and start taking care of myself again. I have had a lot of chest pain/burning and I am going try another pill for that. Taking a lot of pills is something that will never go away for me but its nothing after watching what my dad went through. When I start to get upset about how my health is I just think about him and how strong he was for these last 9 years fighting to stay here with us. I am thankful to be here for my kids, husband and family...In the end its your family who will be there for you...........hold on to them tightly. I hope my next update I am in better shape and lose some weight.... thats all i got for now Michelle

It's been a long time since I have written and so many things have happened since the summer. Physically I am in the best shape I have ever been and really didn't know how sick I was until after surgery. I have lost 19 lbs and feel great!! I continue to work this heart out 4-5 times a week and hope that this spark never goes away. I also am back on sotolal since going into A-Fib again in October. It was 24 hours in the hospital and Doctor said I am high risk for this to happen in the future given all my valve disease. So another pill that I thought was gone will be back for good. My dad is fighting cancer again for the 3rd time so that is where most of my focus has been since summer. It has been up & down and not such great news but with god's will he will live life as long as he can and to the fullest. I had a carotid ultrasound which was routine at my last appt. They found some stenosis in my aortic stent and could explain the arm pain I have had since getting the stent. Still waiting for my Boston Doctors to make the call on whether another procedure is needed. (hope not)!! Al (my surgery buddy) call me a few weeks back and is doing great. Would love to meet up with him soon. With the holidays coming I am going to try to enjoy them much more than last year. I mostly cried through the holidays last year. My family has had a lot of challenges this year but we are all still here and that is what matters. Life is so short and often passes us by before we know it. Love your family & friends this holiday season.....Enjoy every minute..... Michelle

It has been 6 months now!!! I can\'t believe how the time has gone by. I am a different person since January in mind, body & soul. I want to live life to the fullest and never give up trying. I am moving forward and the change has been so positive, Anyone and everyone who is not in my path get outta my way!!! I have my family and some great friends and I am thankful everyday. Mostly I am thankful to see my kids grow and become young adults. I hope it just gets easier from here....thanks again for all the support Love always, Michelle

Tomorrow is bitter sweet for me. I am actually sad that cardiac rehab is done I am going to miss seeing my work out buddies there. I joined a gym last weekend and I and determined to keep this up!! Hard to believe its been 4 months since the scariest day of my life. I feel the best I EVER have and even though emotionally it has not been easy (many, many, many tears) I am proud at how far I have come in such a short period of time. I want to tank all my supporters and you know who you guys are. This website was a great inspiration to me and I was fortunate to have found it. THANK YOU MICHELLE

I have completed 30 days and I haven\'t missed one day of a cardiac work out. I am on the hunt for a new treadmill as mine broke last weekend. The days I don\'t have rehab my ass is getting up at 5:30 to walk 2 miles around my neighborhood. I feel so good!!!! I have also joined weight watchers thanks to a good friend. It was a challenge in the beginning but I have lost 6 lbs since starting 3 weeks ago. I will continue to push myself and feel guilty to miss one day so I haven\'t. I am going to prove that Dr. Landzberg wrong!!! Wait till he sees me again. Love all My family & friends for all the support!!! Michelle

I LOVE cardiac rehab!!!! This is a new me and I am glad to have this opportunity. Personally I have been really stressed and working out is my outlet. I want to make myself proud for the first time in my life I can see that happening. It is about time I put myself FIRST!!!! Cheers to a new me!!!

Yesterday was my post surgery follow up in Boston. The surgeon had nothing much to say other than he wouldn\'t need to see me anymore. This on-x valve should last me many years but no telling just how long. My cardiologist said that I looked great and couldn\'t believe how well I have pulled through this. He also said that my aortic stent\'s life span is unknown and would need to be closely followed. He told me now that I am on the other side it is now my time to shine. He wants me to try to make sure I get a cardio work out daily and to try HARD to keep this new heart of mine healthy. I need to lose weight as I have never really been able to work-out like a \"normal\" person. Now I am a normal person and not to be afraid to push myself more than I have in the past. I got choked up as it is hard for me to believe I made it through this!!!! I thank god everyday that I am here and I will try to make more time for myself and get this body of mine in better shape. This has been a 16 month ride in Boston from start to finish. I thank Dr. Givertz, Dr. Couper and especially Dr.Landzberg for all his care and support. He made me laugh through this whole thing and that\'s the best medicine. It will take a long time for this body of mine to feel 100%....but it will be me who will get it there. Thanks to all of you for your love and support...it has meant a lot to me. Hugs, Michelle

I went to the cardiologist yesterday and he said I could go back to work. He recommended I do a reduced schedule for the first week but with cardiac rehab 3 times a week I will be late to work. That will reduce my hours as it is. These past 6 weeks have gone by so fast and I am thankful to be feeling so good. I hope everyone else on here is doing well and hanging in there. I have touched and been touched by so many fellow AVR patients. Its nice to know there are so many of us out there. I am going back to Boston in a week to follow up with all 3 of my doctors up there. Have some questions about the stent but know this valve is going to out live me!!! Keep on ticking Michelle

So I started today. I think this will be good for me. Of course age wise there is no one my age but I am used to this. I want to challenge myself in these 36 visits. They made me start slow and I wanted to do more..(as I have already been doing the treadmill at home). So 3 times a week until I finish and I will do this before I go to work hopefully starting next week!!! Week 5 is proving to be a much better week!!! Feeling better and more comfortable in bed. My back pain is actually a bit better but continue the physical therapy for that. Friday I see Doctor have an echo and with fingers crossed get the ok to go back to work and back to NORMAL!!! Love ya all Michelle

Physical therapy is helping me a bit with my back pain...I went for my interview for Cardiac Rehab today and they had what seemed like 100 questions. Then told me they are backed up with patients and hopefully can get me to start next week. I am doing me treadmill at home and taking it slow...doctor said to not break a sweat and I am not going faster than 1.8 so far. I did 45 minutes tonight and that was the most I did so far. I am planning on returning to work on 3/4 providing that my echo on 3/1 is all good. I really need to get back to my daily routine.....never thought I would long to get back to work but I do. There is only so much hanging out in this house I can do. The vitamin E is helping to heal my scar much quicker and I feel it looks pretty good for a month. I worry about my daily dressing and how my \"old\" clothes before surgery will show my scar. Some of my shirts I won\'t be able to wear anymore but I will adjust. Thankful its a month already!!! Michelle

God it felt good to be stretched today!!! I have never felt this stiff before. I am anxious to start cardiac rehab because I want to get back to NORMAL!!! This has been a crazy ride that I never thought I would make it through. I should stop complaining about my back pain and be thankful that I am alive. I just hope I will be back to my normal self both physically and mentally. My kids are my strength and Michael has been supporting me every step of the way. He is over cautious especially with me driving but I have to get out. I am thankful for all the support and love I have received. I am going to work hard on getting myself physically better. Only I can do that!! Michelle

Saw my new doctor today and he was great. He said I am doing really good for 3 weeks post and would like me to start cardiac rehab next week. I am also going to do physical therapy for this persistent back and neck pain which he says is pretty common and should have been better by now. As far as laying down and actually getting some sleep he wants me to stop using xanax for a sleep aid and try clonazapan as it will help relax my body and last longer than xanax. I can\'t wait to actually crawl in to bed one night and be comfortable. Maybe after i start rehab this will actually happen. No work until I have an echo on March 1st which means 3 more weeks in this house!!! I am going crazy in this house but have started to work from home a little. With both the rehabs starting next week at least that will occupy my time. Enjoying staying home in the Blizzard today with the family. This experience has really made me see things in a different way.....how precious our lives really are. I promise to never waste another minute!!! Keep on ticking Michelle

I swear this back pain is up & down. I am icing and using a heating pad along with back rubs. Laying flat on my back hurts the most and I throb when I am on my back. I just want a full night\'s sleep. Just when I think maybe its finally getting better it gets worse.... I feel broken. I did go bring my son to the walk-in yesterday and then walked through Wal-mart. I want to do things but when I do I pay for it later. I just can\'t stay in this house anymore!! On a positive note since Michael has the time off from work..I am having him do stuff around the house. This is his last week off and he has gotten a lot done. Hopefully when I see the cardiologist on Friday he can give me some insight as to when I will feel better from this back pain. My incision and stomach tube marks are doing great. Michelle

Went to my PCP today and he said I look pretty good for being 2 weeks out, He said I look a little pale but that is to be expected. No driving or exercise till I see cardiologist which is next Friday. I have tried to do stuff around house like vacuuming, dishes and just picking up. Some days are better than others and I do tire easily, I am not a good patient and hate laying around here all day. I feel like my body is turning to jello. I miss being useful....I am always running around crazy and want to see the kids games, Not this weekend but maybe next (depending what doctor says). To anyone preparing for surgery...you can do this trust me. I was the most anxious person before this and I made it....you can to!!!! Thankful Michelle

My INR went down yesterday so needless to say I have to continue the shot until a re-check on Thursday. I am so tired of needles. On another note I slept pretty good last night and in my bed. God how I missed my bed. Everyday I am getting a bit better and a little less pain in my back. I am having trouble falling asleep without medication but hopefully that will get better. I will get out of the house tomorrow hopefully to walk around outside since the weather is going to be warmer tomorrow.. Hanging in Michelle

I can\'t wait to sleep a full night. Last night for the first time since surgery Michael got me on the couch and I slept 4 hours!!!! The most I have slept since 1/18/13. I feel like this back pain is getting the better of me. It is driving me crazy even with a heating pad and muscle rub. I know that it WILL get better but I am not a patient person. Michael & my mom are taking really good care of me and the house chores. My sister is here twice a day to give me the lovenox shots (which I can\'t wait to stop!!!) I have have enough needles over these last 10 days for a lifetime. I have had food delivered by my friends, edible arrangement, flowers and many cards!! Love all the support and thankful for all of you guys. I am blessed to be here Michelle

I got back late yesterday and it is so nice to be here!!! I missed the kids so much. Doing the lovenox shots until my INR gets regulated and waiting for the VNA to come today. Still have a lot of back pain which is getting old. This time last week I was in surgery...I can\'t believe that a week has gone by and I am so thankful to god for all he has done. To my mom & Michael you truly helped me make it through this....Your love is unconditional and mom I feel closer to you than ever. I love you both and THANK YOU!!! Pai, denise, steve and all my friends...thank you for watching my kids and carting them to all their activities so they could stay as normal as possible. You kindness and love has been so warming!!! I love all of you Now the healing has to start and I am happy to be home to start it. I doubted myself for being strong enough to get through this...I DID IT!!!! Off to rest Michelle

Still in the hospital they want let me go home until my cumidian levels are higher. The days are long and the nights are longer. I need to go home to getsome sleep. Something you dont get much of here. Other then that Im doing good. Michelle

I am herr doing well. Thanks to all my family and friends for supporting my kids. Thank you to the zebal family....yiu care and concern have really touched me and my family!!!! Al we did it!!! Michelle

Michelle is doing better today especially after her neck line and chest tube came out. She is like a new woman. Her color is good and she is starting to look like her \"new self\". She is talking about going home. Misses her kids alot. We are cheering her on. Mom

Just spoke with my mom and she finally got to see her after removing the breathing tube. They had to wait while they were trying to stabilizing her blood pressure. She woke for a few minutes was in a lot of pain and ask what time it was and went back to sleep and has been resting since then. I will up date again in the morning. :) Denise

We just got word that surgery is over and it went great!!! Thank you all for all your prayers. I cant wait until she wakes up and starts bitching again!! :) Her sister Denise

Michelle\'s Mom here updating. She just went in at 7:30. Was very nervous but determined to get it done. Keep praying and will update when we know more. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PRAYERS Mom