Susan Smith, on the pre-op side of life posted a note for Heather that says:
Heather glad to know you are around the corner and moving forward. With all your traveling, you are doing great. Your cup is half full not half empty.
You explained your pre surgery frustration so well. But I wonder...I felt the very same way. I could not get control of anything and the more forward progress I attempted the further behind I got!! The things I loved and enjoyed did not seem to be as important. The feelings you speak of were similar to mine except, I had no clue that I had a heart problem. This was occurring several months before the doctor discovered I had a Bicuspid Aortic Valve with severe stenosis. The doctor found the murmur in Feb. 2012 and replaced the valve in April. So I wonder if the symptoms you are having are a result of your health rather than the upcoming surgery. Food for thought....
Heather, I think the way you are feeling is completely normal. I am four weeks post op for a AVR. I remember getting my surgery date and feeling like suddenly my whole life had turned in a direction I was completely unprepared for. Try to focus on what you can anticipate needing once you get home. Meals in the freezer, reorganize things in your home for easier access. I think at four weeks that I could do more but I am babying myself more that I should.lol You will be surprised at how fast you will well enough to do premissable tasks for yourself. I know that i put books, movies, thankyou cards, etc.. near my bed for when I got home. I bought new sheets and some new pillows to make my bed a little more inviting, lol. I did some stuff around my home pre surgery that kind of made me excited to begin my recovery. All in all, pre surgery is mentally very very stressful. Just keep visualizing yourself on the other side of this. You will do fine and before you know it you will be home recovering.
I have Mitral Valve Prolapse/Regurgitation and am facing surgery very soon. I am currently consulting with surgeons and getting opinions. I am only 48 and do not want a valve replacement. I want a repair. I totally understand where you are coming from. I have days that I'm calm and accepting of what's to come and other days that I cannot sleep and am in total panic. This surgery is all I can seem to think about. I'm so grateful for this site and the wonderful people who have reached out to me. I am very thankful for my amazing husband who has been by my side through everything. Let your friends and family help where they can even if it is just to listen to your feelings.
Hi Heather. I totally get your situation and have a couple of suggestions prior to having your surgery that might help and they would apply to your recuperation period after. As you have friends willing to help out, let them. Make a list of what you need done and divie out the chaos. The last thing you need is more stress when all your energies should be going towards your mental prepartion. I was lucky to have one of my sisters come to stay for 7 weeks and had to allow her to do everything while I focused on myself. She cleaned house, did the laundry, changed the linens, shopped, cooked, cleand up, picked up my meds, had my favourite "comfort" foods available etc. I told her what I needd done and she did it all.
I also made an e-mail list of "Friends of Carole" for my sister to keep in contact with daily telling of my progress. This was without a doubt a key factor in my recovery as I heard from so many of those friends who sent their love and encouragement. But I was the one who had to let them in and they responded gladly and lovingly. It hadn't been my nature but boy am I glad I reached out. What I also came to understand is that my friends were relieved and really happy to be kept in the loop.
I hope this helps. It has been over 4 months since my MV replacement and I am loving living! All the best, Carole